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 What is self-confidence

What is self-confidence


The methods of successfully teaching a character trait or skill are fundamentally similar. In our case, this quality is Self - Confidence. In order to learn something, we need to know:


1. What is it - the definition of quality or skill.

2. In what will this quality or ability be manifested in me when I acquire it: in the internal state and in the external appearance.

3. How much "this", or what of this do I need to acquire or earn in the first place.

4. What can I rely on in myself (personal abilities, in our context: abilities and skills).

5. What I am ready to do and do for this.

6. Where will I start, how long each day, and what I will do for this.

7. When I start: day, month, year, hour.


   Often in our life, when we talk with other people, for some reason we believe that what we understand, they also understand. And it seems to us that under the same words, we understand the same concepts, but this habitual opinion is very far from the real state of affairs. Therefore, it is best to first define the term confidence itself.

    For example, one of the formulations of such a quality as efficiency - "Efficiency is the ability to achieve a target within a specified time frame with a minimum investment of effort and time," and now we need to find a definition to be sure.

A small clarification, we need just a general definition of Confidence and not three components of this skill by level:

  •  confidence in a person or confidence next to a person,
  •  self-confidence,
  •  confidence in a group of people, for example, a team, a team, or confidence with a group ..

   There is one good short phrase of Confidence used in the movie "Sorcerers" - "See the goal, belief in yourself, ignore the obstacles" or 100% certainty that you will succeed.

 There is a wording from the respected psychologist V.Romek  " Self-confidence- property of the individual, the core of which stands a positive assessment of the individual's own skills and abilities as sufficient to achieve the goals meaningful to him and his needs. "

For a more detailed examination of the wording is not part of our tasks))

    The second point is how we, in fact, by external manifestations (what can be seen with our eyes and heard with our ears) can distinguish a confident person from an insecure or self-confident person.

Let's take a few external manifestations that we can see and hear when observing people, namely speech and body position in space.


1. Speech:

- Smooth - with one speed;

- Lack of pauses and letters of the hitch (aaa, eee, iii, mmm, etc.);

- The presence of the pronoun "I", (me, mine, in my opinion);

- Ability to say No and Yes;

- Ability to be the first to make contact (start and end communication);

- Completion of phrases with imperative verbs: go, carry, come on, etc;

- When you increase the volume of speech, its speed is maintained;

- When laughing, the chest is flat or open.


2. Position of the body in space:

- Ability to take a stable, comfortable (comfortable posture);

- Turns to the interlocutor with the whole body;

- Unconsciously occupy the center of free space;

- Gestures correspond to speech.


And a few answers to the third point - what advantages does self-confidence give a person:


- The ability to put your interests first.

- Respect for yourself and your opinion.

- Feeling of inner dignity.

- The ability to defend your point of view (your opinion) or the ability to insist on your own.

- Ability to take the first step on the way (business, relationship, etc.).

- Ability to get what you want.

- Independence (financial)

- Achieve set goals in a short time

- Self-realization

- Lives his own life

- Decide for himself how and what to do

- If desired, he is in the center of attention

- Ability to lead and be a leader


    On the fourth point, only you yourself can answer. You need to write or remember 7 of your best, in your opinion, qualities, and skills.


   And, in fact, the fifth and sixth points- actions. Below you see a plate in which there are several specific actions (by time or number of times) aimed specifically at developing such a quality as self-confidence (average Manipura).


     The seventh point: when I start, here - "the owner is the master")) For example, 05/16/2007 at 12 10.

    * It is important to remember that words like try, try, try - destroy Manipura and reduce confidence. Better to start, and then along the way and see what happens. Good luck with what comes out))

How and in what way, I can most quickly and effectively develop "Self-Confidence"

No.What do i doHow much do I do
onePraise and encouragement - find success in your actionsThree actions a day
2I meet and communicate with successful and self-confident people1 person a week, 20 minutes a day.
3I look for and find positive in negative (lost cell phone - you can buy a new model)4 situations a day.
4I learn from my own and other people's positive example (learn from my own and the successes of others, and not just from their mistakes)I paint 2 situations a week.
fiveI listen to silence between words (do not fight the sounds of parasites, namely, fill in the pauses between words and phrases t and w and n)30 minutes a day.
6I start phrases with a personal pronoun and end with an imperative verb: "I want to know how much it costs, tell me", "I am interested in this red jacket, how much does it cost, tell me."5 phrases every day, only in the market, in a store or cafe.
7I speak a little louder than usual20 minutes a day
eightDuring the day, I write down phrases and thoughts that reduce confidence (I don't know, I can't, I won't succeed) and in the evening I rewrite them in a constructive (I know about this and that, from this I can do this and that )Four every day for a month.
nineWork with past situations where insecurity was manifested and rewrite and replay them positively2 situations per week.
10Imagine how the most confident person you know would act in this situation1 situation per week.
elevenWhen I stand, I occupy the center of free spaceThree times a day for 3 minutes.
 Physical exercise:  
12"To swing" the press (on a connected breath - inhalation turns into exhalation)Two approaches each.
13Walk with an emphasis on the arch of the foot (the place where the toes "pass" into the foot)20 minutes a day.
fourteenIn breathing, focus on abdominal breathing - "diaphragmatic" (with the participation of the press zone)15 minutes a day.
fifteenDeflections lying on the floor with a swallow (lying with your stomach on the floor, lifting up)Five times.
sixteenInhale through the mouth for 6 counts with the sound "Ha", exhale for 4 counts with the nose with the sound "Hu"15 minutes a day.
17To pour cold water with a large amount (with a basin, a bucket - on coherent breathing)Once in the morning.
Do the exercises until "I can", and so two or three approaches per exercise (you cannot count the number in exercises)
To douche either before physical education, or not earlier than after 30 minutes. After physical education, be silent for 10 - 20 minutes.
Finish physical education with exercises that activate the abdominal zone you need (top, bottom, middle).
18Buying items that increase self-confidenceputting aside 10% of income for it.
nineteenImplement the decision made immediately after making it (decided to call - immediately took the phone and started dialing)From three solutions a day.
twentyPronounce self-confidence affirmations . For example: "Every day I become more confident in myself", "Every day it becomes easier and easier for me to meet strangers"Three times in front of the mirror aloud in the morning and in the evening.
21Apply phrases of a positive attitude : "I can do it", "I can do it", "I deserve it", "I can do it", "If not me, then who?"10 times a day.

I have given here only a part of the techniques and actions for building self-confidence. The main thing is to understand the principle that confidence can be gradually increased or decreased by conscious work with oneself. Since in some situations we get benefits and benefits when we demonstrate self-confidence, and in others - when we help another person feel his confidence (sometimes even at our expense).

And on this page information about phrases for working with Self-Confidence

Alexander Ilyinsky

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