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Good day, readers of the site Allgoodtutorials. This section is devoted to the topic of trust in its various forms and types. On the site, you can find the points of view of different people from different eras on this issue and practical methods of developing and acquiring Confidence.
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btc mixerGood day, readers of the site Self-confidence. This site is dedicated to the topic Confidence in its various forms and forms. On the site you can find the points of view of different people from different eras on this issue and practical methods of developing and gaining Confidence.

Confidence is a person's positive assessment of their own skills and abilities as sufficient to achieve their goals and satisfy their needs *. The basis for the formation of such assessments is a sufficient, positive experience in solving social problems and successfully achieving their own goals (meeting needs). For the formation of self-confidence, it is not so much objective life success, status, money that is important, but a subjective positive assessment of the results of one's own actions and assessments that follow from the side of significant people (parent, teacher, husband, friend).

* Romek V.G.

Why is Confidence taken for the wording and not "Confidence in oneself"? Because in my practice I have to work with different manifestations of Confidence.

1. Confidence in themselves

2. Confidence in communicating with another person

3. Confidence when communicating with a group of people

And it often happens that one person has enough confidence and the other is very lacking. So, at lectures and trainings, I usually first of all offer people to determine what kind of confidence they need in the first place. And only then draw up a plan of action and then ACT to achieve the intended goal.


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Confidence with one personConfidence can differ in its manifestation in terms of the amount of energy.

Normally, this is confidence. 
If there is a lack, it is uncertainty. 
In excess, it is overconfidence. 

There are also three types of this energy that affect what a person is sure of and what he is not. The fact is that self-confidence , confidence in communicating with one person and confidence in communicating with a group of people  are different types of confidence, which are manifested and developed in different ways.
I can give a number of examples as options for manifesting different types of confidence.

First example... In Chisinau, the most successful seller of a "Canadian company" who could easily sell his goods to any person (one) from a housewife to a bank director and earned a lot of money on sales was asked by the company's management to share the "secrets" of success. And upon entering the stage, this person - a confident salesman who could easily persuade almost anyone - suddenly began to stutter, worry and confuse words. And the reason for this is that his confidence in communicating with one person was excellently developed, and there was very little confidence in communicating with the group. Usually, confidence in communicating with one person is manifested in the fact that a person is excellently able to start and end communication (negotiations, deal) with one person. Representatives of such confessions as a traffic policeman and a gypsy have a discoverer,

Demonstrating Confidence Gains Confidence

Goethe on Confidence
"I affirm that a person will never be able to know himself," - said Goethe.    

   From the point of view of the monistic concept, any of our emotional experiences is reflected in bodily movements. Moreover, our internal states are not the cause or effect of the corresponding body movements, but coincide with them.  

     When we are worried, for example, during a public speech, this experience can be expressed in such voluntary body movements as: muscle clamps; unnecessary gestures that do not depend on the spoken words; a running glance, directed not at the eyes of the audience, but wandering along the walls, floor and ceiling; quiet, trembling voice, etc. And also in such involuntary 
(reflex) movements, such as: increased levels of adrenaline and other hormones in the blood, heart palpitations, changes in blood pressure, facial flushing, sweating, changes in pupil diameter, etc. (By the way, with the help of a lie detector, it is precisely these, often outwardly imperceptible, involuntary movements of the body that are detected ).

Self-confidence from Felix Kirsanov      Sometimes people ask me: "What books are worth reading to gain self-confidence?" You guess what is the appropriate answer here (especially useful for those who like to study literalism, that is, to devote themselves entirely to book theory only): of course, books are good, but only a bare theory can be beautiful at times. like a wedding bride, but completely sterile without a groom - a fertilizing experience. You won't get very far on semi-circular crescent-shaped wheels.

They say that knowledge is power. But it's worth adding:only if it applies. You can read mountains of books, but the knowledge gained from them will remain a dead weight in your head if they are not applied in practice. Self-confidence in public speaking, just like, say, the ability to gently light a cigarette from a tracer bullet flying past, while not getting burned and getting into the Guinness Book of Records, is a skill that can only increase as a result of alternating practical actions with theirs. the subsequent realization - all according to the same scheme of ours "I KNOW - I CAN".

Fanaticism as an excess of confidence, and the benefits of fanaticismHere is another example of an interesting opinion from the Internet about fanaticism as an extreme manifestation of Overconfidence. And about what such a benefit can be from fanaticism. After all, the speed of achieving the goal of the fanatic is maximum, because doubts are not peculiar to him and ONLY his goal and methods are righteous or true)))

So how do you recognize a fan? Very simple. The fan is a vivid representative of the rough black and white thinking. Moreover, in the case of fanaticism, no shades of gray are provided. Either black or white, the fan does not recognize any combination options. For example, a Hare Krishna fan sincerely thinks that the worst Hare Krishna is still much better than the best Christian, and a Christian fan, he is sure that the worst Christian is still much better than the best Hare Krishna. In a word, someone who is not with us cannot fall into our white category, no matter what he does for this, he will always be in the black category.

And this suggests that we do not allow representatives of other ways of thinking into our consciousness. And this happens only for one reason - we do not know what to say to them if they ask us why we see this world in this way. We simply do not know the answers to the questions of why and why we do what we do. We are extremely unsure of our choice, which means that we exclude any possibility of conversations on this topic. And among the fans there are no questions, by the way, this is also one of the symptoms of fanaticism. What questions can a person who is afraid of questions have? Therefore, you may have noticed how we insist that questions be asked before and after the lecture.

Fanaticism and Confidence.  Or extreme overconfidence in the form of bigotryThe most striking manifestation of the extreme stage of confidence is not even Overconfidence, but Fanaticism. As a vivid example describing the manifestation of FAITH, Voltaire's opinion about gentlemen fanatics, which has reached the extreme, is very interesting. And although Walter lived in the 17th century, the text is interesting and now, although it is emotionally filled with Voltaire's personal relationship to fanatics.  

Fanaticism is for superstition - what frenzy is for fever, what frenzy is for malice. Anyone who has ecstasy, visions, who takes dreams for reality and fantasies for predictions is an enthusiast; the one who supports his madness by murders is a fanatic. Jean Diaz, who had retired to Nuremberg, was completely convinced that the pope was the antichrist of the Apocalypse, and that he had the mark of the beast on him: he was an enthusiast. His brother Bartolomeo Diaz, who set out from Rome to sacredly kill his brother, and, indeed, who killed him for the love of God, was one of the most disgusting fanatics ever created by superstition.

Polyeuct goes to the temple on the day of the solemn celebration, knocks over and breaks statues and ornaments: he is a fanatic, but not as terrible as Diaz, but no less stupid. The assassins of Duke François de Guise, William, Prince of Orange, King Henry III, King Henry IV and many others are demoniac, possessed by the same fury as Diaz.

The most disgusting example of fanaticism is the fanaticism of the Parisian bourgeois, who rushed to kill, cut, throw at windows, and tear to shreds their compatriots who did not go with them to mass.

Announcement of the book "Confidence or How to Find and Raise a Leader"Confidence has long been synonymous with success for our contemporaries. The demand for books, trainings, lectures and seminars on this topic is constantly growing. And it is no coincidence! A self-confident person highly appreciates his capabilities, actively builds and develops his own business, easily achieves financial stability, knows how to declare his desires and goals, can openly refuse the interlocutor without ruining relations with him.

This is the leader they follow, they believe in him, they want to cooperate with him!

At the same time, self-doubt is a sign of weakness of character. Such a person is afraid to start his own business ("It won't work anyway!"), He does not know how to express his own opinion, does not believe that it is possible to fulfill his dreams and goals. Insecure people rarely succeed in life.

Fear or Confidence - Development or Degradation?And yet, what is scary to gain knowledge about oneself?

The fear of knowing about oneself is parallel to the fear of the outside world. Like many fears, this type of fear is protective because it protects our love and respect for ourselves.

Now, now you can hide behind such a slogan - I don't want to know anything about myself in order not to lose respect and love for myself.

If we do not know ourselves, then how can we say that we respect and love ourselves?

In general, in life we ​​respect and love a person whom we do not know at all?

I agree that we can respect a stranger thanks to our upbringing. But to love a person whom we do not know at all ... I disagree, there are not so many enlightened people capable of unconditional love in the world. But back to respect - we respect a stranger because we were raised that way, and not for something, because we don't know him.

Positive attitude to increase confidence in one-person communicationPositive Attitude * to Increase Confidence in Dealing with One Person :

I can say no while staying calm.
Today I will easily take responsibility for inviting a new business partner;
Today I will confidently and competently conduct the planned business meeting;
I can easily and confidently start communicating with a stranger;
I will be able to entrust this business to my business partner, believing that he will succeed.

Positive Attitude * to Increase Confidence in Communicating with a Group of People :

I can easily speak to a large audience today;
I will be able to convey to the audience what I have planned;
I will easily and confidently offer people what I have decided;
I will be able to quickly and efficiently convey what I decided to the audience, speaking in its language.

Secrets of communicating with a confident personAnd now, dear readers, we would like to talk about the peculiarities of communication with leaders - with a confident person (not to confuse a leader with a leader), a monster of one of the two sexes. Why is this so important?
The fact is that every dynamically developing leader is financially interested in having as many employees with leadership qualities in his business as possible. One of the ways to solve this problem is to develop leadership qualities in your employees. The second way is to invite already formed leaders from business or government structures to the business. And for this you need to be able to speak with them in their language and take into account some of their features, characteristic only of self-confident people.

The first thing that you, dear reader, should remember that the presence of confidence or the ability to take responsibility in no way guarantees decency, ethics, intelligence, commitment - rather the opposite. And although many of these listed qualities are present in leaders to one degree or another, you should always check for their presence. And in their absence, behave in such a way that your case does not suffer from this.

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